Peak cinema. I have seen this movie at least like ten times at this point. It is so good. Top tier movie with a good message: ken is awesome too. It also had some good points about over consumption, which, this movie inevitably caused to happen even more! So I guess it does not actually care about the environment.

A movie about a child who took too many drugs and now has to explore the four magical realms to find a key to safe Christmas. And she's currently in magical realm one with people who look like drag artists in 70s cheap historical knockoff glittery outfits. It vibes a lot like Alice in wonderland but worse, that's where the drugs part came from. It was an interesting film.

Fucking your boss' nineteen year old kid is a bit weird, especially when you are lying about your age and identity. Or maybe I am just too woke, but what do I know. For the rest still decently comedic.

World's shittiest cops infiltrate a high school. A teacher simps over one of them, thinking he is 17, which was fucking weird. The other kisses a high school student, which was also fucking weird. Overall quite an entertaining film which got a couple chuckles out of me, even if it was quite shit.

Boring twist on good vs bad witches, a bit boring. I did like the very medieval setting with like magical guns, or something. Just shooting guns at medieval peasants in the name of freedom and protection. And I do not mean muskets, rather, full blown modern miniguns, snipers, rifles, etc. SLAUGHTER THE CIVILIANS.

The cgi in this movie felt surprisingly well done, and it feels like it holds up to today's cgi. The story was a bit mediocre though. A simple love story between a witch and a witch hunter, with extra drama added.

Spongebob goes on a suicide mission to safe his corrupt capitalist overlord who has literally sold him to his arch enemy before for cash. He is doing a good deed for an evil person. However, his adventure were still very entertaining, especially with the appearance of David Hasselhof.

I do not even know how to start to describe this movie. All you need to know is that it was one of the worst movies I have watched. And it was in dutch too. I had hoped for a better watch.

This is a masterfully beautiful movie about living under lies and deception. I knew all along that something was up with the village, but had no clue what it might have been. The twist that Noah Percy was dressed and killed while disguised as a monster was heartbreaking, as he was my favorite character. And the twist that they were not living in the late 1800s was a bit of a surprise to me, but then again, I am quite stupid. This is a great watch which I would recommend.

Holy Kim Wexler jump scare!!! This movie is a confused mess of shitty CGI and storytelling boiling down to the thought that men are trash. And of course scary flying tablecloths during a seance with a haunted ring.

woke bad, or something.

Fuck how I love this movie, and it always just reminds me how I should never go into the music bizz and that I should just live my life as I do right now.

There are deeper meanings in this film for sure, and I bet you I could write an entire essay on this film if I truly felt bothered to. It is a great movie with a banger plot and absolutely awesome visuals. There is some amount of body horror, but also lots of mental horror. I wholeheartedly recommend this movie to everyone.

This movie was a great time to watch, it was fun and very engaging and definitely helps keep up my appreciation for poetry. I love the setting of a conservative christian boys school, the time period was also a fun add. I think this is a great movie about boys being boys in a not-very-disruptive manner, and still just have a good time.

O Captain! my Captain! our fearful trip is done,
The ship has weather'd every rack, the prize we sought is won,
The port is near, the bells I hear, the people all exulting,
While follow eyes the steady keel, the vessel grim and daring;
But O heart! heart! heart!
O the bleeding drops of red,
Where on the deck my Captain lies,
Fallen cold and dead.

O Captain! my Captain! rise up and hear the bells;
Rise up-for you the flag is flung-for you the bugle trills,
For you bouquets and ribbon'd wreaths-for you the shores a-crowding,
For you they call, the swaying mass, their eager faces turning;
Here Captain! dear father!
This arm beneath your head!
It is some dream that on the deck,
You've fallen cold and dead.

My Captain does not answer, his lips are pale and still,
My father does not feel my arm, he has no pulse nor will,
The ship is anchor'd safe and sound, its voyage closed and done,
From fearful trip the victor ship comes in with object won;
Exult O shores, and ring O bells!
But I with mournful tread,
Walk the deck my Captain lies,
Fallen cold and dead.

-Walt Whitman

This story lost the plot. More and more unhinged. It just kept going. Who names his store pedos? Why did the toy maker kill his kid? Why did the toy maker go on a killing spree? Why did his son do the same? His artificial robot son. His robot son made by him because his actual son died. Why did the son robot try to fuck who he claimed to be his mom? Why was there an intensely long sex scene that only got ended by evil haunted magic toys. Why is the main kid not the yapper? Very yappen't. All that gets said about that is that it is because of the incident. What incident? I also significantly lost the plot of this movie, which is expected after watching five of these in a day. Why do I torture myself. I would like to add it did not include any plot from any of the previous four movies, but it did vaguely have to do with Christmas! Unlike the previous movie.

This is not a Christmas movie anymore. This is a murder mystery esque magic movie with a small couple of deaths. There are witches and spontaneous human combustion. The lovelife of the main character was also to big of a plot for my liking. I do not know what more I need to say.

Psychic magic blind girl dreams about seeing the killer of the first movie. It is later revealed that he can view the world through her eyes, too. He has now become a near immortal god-like being with psychic powers and a resistance to point blank shotgun shots. He kills people again, and it is a Christmas movie because it takes place during Christmas, I guess

Half the movie was a recap using a lot of the initial movie scenes. It was just reused scenes. Then, a bunch of killings followed by the brother of the main character in the precious movie escaping his psych ward and killing for Christmas. He killed Mother Superior, which was honestly based. A lot worse than the first part, but not dogass awful.

This movie was a lot better than I expected. It is a solid Christmas slasher, and the villain has good motivation. It is a well-made film and I would recommend it to people. Not bad for an 80s Christmas slasher.

This movie is an absolutely gorgeous biography of Frida Kahlo's life, her paintings were wonderfully animated and wonderfully alternated with photos and videos of her life. It also uses her words from her diary and the letters she has written to tell the story. Another aspect I loved is that it was largely told in Spanish, even though I do not speak it, I thought it was a great touch seeing it was her native language. I would definitely implore people to watch this. It is a truly awesome documentary.

Heavily tattooed viking santa is an alcoholic and gets stuck in a house which is being robbed by specialized robbery units. This causes santa to go on a major killing spree, resulting in 10s of deaths. He saves a kid and almost dies, before getting mad at his reindeer. This movie is like a christmas John Wick. Would recommend.

Berserk robot movie. With a bunch of sex. There are lots of deaths. But the nerds saves the day and gets the girl. Mall edition!!

The plot of this movie was rather interesting, as was the behavior of the characters. There was the bad one, the boss, wrongly conficted for being a serial killer. He got sent to an insane asylum which completely snapped his brain causing the events of the movie to happen. The love interest, quirked up white boy, the actual murderer who managed to get away with the murders by pinning it on someone else. And you have the survivor, the main girl, she was a key witness to the killing. She did not witness the final blow nor did she give an inaccurate witness statement. She figures it all out and writes a book about it. Resulting in the death of the quirked up white boy. Overall, awesome movie. Quite gorey though, not highest budget and you can tell that, but it really was not a bad movie.

I liked this movie at first, until the twist that three of the witches are absolute cunts. Like sure, absolute power corrupts absolutely, but, at the same time, I feel like this movie ended up having a slight "it is for the better that these people get bullied because else they would bully others" message, which I am personally not fond of, considering my personal history with bullying and harassment. It ended up feeling like a mediocre, now overdone storyline which I generally do not like from the start. I would not recommend it.

The biggest draw of this movie was elviras humongous hairdo. And her personality. The cgi in this movie was awesome, felt so 60s in looks. The story was great, but not as great as elviras massive tits, which were on full display for the entire duration of the film. She has massive tits which are integral to the plot of the movie. And they were the plot of the movie. Her car was kind of swagger too, but it would kill her in a crash. (I wrote this while quite drunk.)

Somehow the stakes raised even compared to the prior movie. There was even a major character death, which made me feel sad. And considering the cliffhanger we ended the last movie on it was extra tense from the start. I think this might have been my favorite movie in the series thus far. The story is great, as were the fights like usual.

I think this may have been my least favorite John Wick movie so far. He just feels so lost and confused like a little puppy all alone in the world. Doing stuff just for the sake of it. The fighting scenes were good as always though, the John Wick series has not yet gone wrong with those. They often feel tense and risky, even though John Wick appears like some nigh immortal God-like being who is incapable of dying.

This one I had no memory of. I think last time I watched it I was in bed with my bestie and we just passed out halfway through the movie? I do not adequately recall. It is once more a high action, high speed movie with a lot going on constantly. It was once more quite good, however this time it feels Keanu, I mean, John Wick's motivation has become a bit cloudy. He does not wholly go for revenge, rather, taking many lives to prolong his own. I wonder where this will go in the next movie.

Man goes on a rampage because someone killed his dog. That was all I remembered about this movie going into it. It is so much more tragic than that. He goes on a rampage in order to exact his revenge on all who have wronged him, and who are not able to accept his revenge. He has become a God of death because of the actions of those whom have wronged him. He has become the ultimate ideal for those Andrew Tate simps to look up to. I did really like the story though.

On first impression I did not expect to love this movie anywhere near as much as I did. The contrast between Tony Lib and Dr. Donald Shirley was great, as was the manner in which they uplift each other. They fill in each other's shortcomings. This is a great feelgood movie. Overall I do not have much to say about this movie, it was just a good movie which I can not add many more thoughts to.

This musical is once more a hellish fever dream like experience. An evil God from an alternative dimension invades ours through adorable little plushies that brainwash people into killing each other for them. It is obvious where they are drawing inspiration from, but it just feels absurd when you add the evil God bit. The story also has several side plots surrounding family and how broken they are. This is also a returning topic in this musical, seeing multiple main characters have incredibly dysfunctional families. For the rest it feels like an awesome addition to the already absurd world this musical is set in, with recurring characters from previous movies.

The guy just does not like musicals. This musical is about Paul. Paul is the most boring guy imaginable. He has hobbies, no real friends, a boring office job and was single as a Pringle. But then, out of nowhere, a musical meteorite hits the music hall. This causes people to be turned into zombies of the musical hivemind. Paul keeps escaping and surviving, because he has nothing he wants in life because he is so boring. I give you this little summary of the first twenty odd minutes as a show of how absurd this musical is. It is an absolutely hilarious shitshow of comedy and comedy^2 with many a gag and all the while you try to take it serious. And the story, although it is very absurd, absolutely slaps. Mixed with the actors' ability to play multiple characters makes this show a must watch! I strongly recommend it to anyone who thinks this may be intriguing.

Once again an interesting movie that my partner wanted to watch, and so we did. This is honestly a masterpiece, I do not in the slightest understand why it had such a low box office. It is so camp. The masks look awesome, and the practical effects are intensely 80s. The characters in this film are definitely a strong point. They develop a lot in the duration of the movie, and I absolutely fell in love with some of them. My favorites were the Terenzi brothers by a long shot. They are awesome and funny and oh so silly. I love their energy and chemistry, and also love the high jinks they pull during the entirety of the movie. Another honorable mention is the two presumably gay guys who got thrown in prison by the very conservative chief and later got killed there.

What did I just watch? Why did I watch this? Why did the alpha straight bros turn gay? They are literally brothers, and twins at that, I did not need A God sanctioned twincest marriage being forced upon my retinas. I regret watching this, but that one song about love was banger. And I find the mom and dad relatable, they are very me coded. This movie was honestly an absurd masterpiece though, and I would not be surprised if I would voluntarily rewatch it sometime in the future.

This movie was so bad it was enjoyable. I was not the target audience for this film and I was unable to figure out who actually would have been. It was so hilariously bad that I kind of ended up loving it. It was absurd, and stuff just happened with little reason to. The blind guy somehow catching a crossbow bolt, thinking he can see before walking into a tree, the witch saving the bad guy's life only to force him to marry her, the metal underwear, and I could just keep naming hilariously bad things that happened. I kept switching between cringing and laughing and a mix of both while watching it.
If you think stupid, unrealistic, hilariously bad movies are great, I would recommend this movie! (Broomhilde is great, I love her.)

I will also write here about "‘Robin Hood: Men in Tights’ – The Legend Had It Coming (1993)" The behind the scenes of this movie, which are supposedly better. The deleted arrow point of view scene is abolutely rediculous, I love it. Especially the fact it splits a tree clean in half. I can not take this serious, but I do not think I am supposed to in the first place. Oh my god, some of the actors are breaking the fourth wall in character. This is gold. This is literal comedy gold. It is hilarious deleted scenes, mixed with the most comedic bits, all condensed into a much shorter formfactor. There are also hilarious clips of inspiration for scenes in this movie, which I also really love. Overall a good movie. I would recommend this movie more than the full one.

This is a movie I hold dear to my hear. It is great, it is lovely, it is wholesome. It is a rollercoaster, both in terms of the story and what it does to my emotions. Forrest Gump is a great guy with an interesting life. From fighting a war, to becoming a war hero, to becoming an icon in the peace movement. From shrimping, to table tennis, to American football and running indefinetely without purpose. He is a great guy with a good heart. He loves those around him, even when they are not good to him. Yet somehow he got a mostly happy ending. He got the girl, and the child. He has a nice home and things to do.
One of my favorite little details is that Forrest Gump loses from his son in table tennis because he stopped looking at the ball in order to look at his son, the most beautiful thing in his life. The literal lovechild of him and his no passed away wife. I also really like how the general changed from a pro war, wanting to die in it lieutenant into a resentful person, into an accepting person.
My only criticism of this movie is how it frames all the social injustice movements, such as the anti war movement and the blackpanthers are framed as a joke and a bad way to go, and thus that blind obedience is the only way to be a good person and to be happy. Which is something I do not agree with at all, because if we did that, the world would be a lot worse for wear.

This sure was a movie. I remember I used to like it years back, but now that is not the case anymore. It is significantly weaker than I remember, especially toward the end of the story. It is just a lazy remake of the original with less spark (I will re-watch the original and review it soon, I promise!!). It feels like it does not have anything new nor special to offer. It feels like a lazy attempt at a cash grab by redoing an old movie with a unique plot that has been largely forgotten and now obscure movie.
That is all I have to say on this movie.